Path: athena.cs.uga.edu!emory!wupost!cs.utexas.edu!usc!elroy.jpl.nasa.gov!decwrl!looking!funny-request From: muzzle@cs.uq.oz.au Newsgroups: rec.humor.funny Subject: The Hitch-Hiker's Guide To The Operating System Keywords: original, maybe, computer Message-ID: [S2f7.197@looking.on.ca] Date: 15 Sep 91 23:30:05 GMT Lines: 35 Approved: funny@looking.on.ca EXTRACT FROM "The Hitch-Hiker's Guide To The Operating System" ============================================================== "This is your kernel speaking so suspend whatever you're doing and send "ACK". FIRSTLY: I see from our keyboard status register that we have a couple of glitch characters in the input buffer.... Hello! Hello, whatever you are! I just want to make it totally clear that you are NOT AT ALL WELCOME! I worked hard polling the status register for the likes of you, and I'm not about to turn my process table into a bus service for degenerate ASCII codes. I've sent out a SIGKILL, and when it finds you, I've ordered it to re-direct you into /dev/null!!! (If you're very lucky, I might show you some of my source code first!) SECONDLY: We are about to jump into transit mode for the journey to $000C0FD9, and upon arrival, the system will be in single-user mode for a 72ms wait-state, during which no one's to read or write; I REPEAT: ALL I/O IS SUSPENDED! ...... I've just had an TPC/IP timeout, so I don't see why anyone else should use IRC. ^D " ============================================================== An original joke by Murray Chapman and Ian Peake. -- Selected by Brad Templeton. MAIL your joke (jokes ONLY) to funny@looking.ON.CA Do not use "looking.uucp" or just "looking." Attribute the joke's source if at all possible. A Daemon will auto-reply.
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